Time Out For Women, Part 1

On April 8^th, I wrote an entry about finally being able to accept myself, my body, and my current role in life. I presented it as a quick change of mind and heart. This is not accurate. Though that experience was the kick in the butt I needed to finally accept me for me, there were many things leading up to that point; things that, I believe, were slowly making that change. Isn’t that the way the Lord works, after all? Line upon line? Precept upon precept?

One of the major steps in finding my new perspective was found in my attending “Time Out for Women” in November. “For over 10 years, Time Out for Women has been inviting faithful women to step away from the daily routine and make space for themselves and their spiritual lives. What started as an inspirational weekend event full of music, cheering, presenters, friends, and laughter has grown into a worldwide community of like-minded women seeking good. Whether they connect through TOFW.com or at a local event, TOFW women are choosing to be uplifted, reenergized, educated, entertained, and inspired with thousands of women all over the world.” (tofw.com)

I’d like to share some of the thoughts that hit home with me- that helped me take the next few steps in accepting myself and my divine destiny. There were several AMAZING people, mostly sisters, who presented on various topics. I will share the thoughts in presenter order, and share my reaction to each of the thoughts. I probably won’t finish sharing all my notes in this one blog, so I will write another blog on the same topic.

“Find contentment in the

season you are in.”

(Thought given by Sandra- unfortunately, I didn't write down her last name.) At the time, I was looking at a person in the mirror I didn’t know. I was trying to look like I did in college. I was trying to have more work experience. Even as a stay-at-home mom, I am sometimes able to get freelance work as a choreographer and dance teacher. I hadn’t worked for a while, and I was dwelling on that fact. Somehow, this made me less of a person. As I have turned the corner, I see myself as I am now: A slightly overweight mother of three with graying hair (YES!!! SO excited about this), who has been given a different calling. I see it now- and I’m good with it.

“The gifts that we have been

given can be used to

counteract our trials.”

(Sheri Dew) What an interesting thought! In Bipolar, and I imagine many other trials, it is easy to dwell on the negative things. And we have to put up a fight to get through those trials. Each of us have been given specific trials- and each of us have been given specific gifts. I imagine each trial is like being locked in a room. These gifts act as keys to open the doors and windows and let in a little air.

Specific example? Bipolar is one of my life-long trials. I have been able to use a gift of expression to help me cope. I have had several years of performing experience- dance, theatre, and music to help me not be afraid of speaking/performing in front of others. As such, I have found opportunities to share my trials- again, helping myself cope, but also helping others realize they are not alone. This has been a huge blessing for me. I also have this blog- though started simply as a type of journal writing to help me cope- has turned into so much more.

Quick thinking: What are your trials? Now, what are your gifts? How can you use those gifts to help you counteract your trials?

“We are custom made

to fill unique parts.”

(Elaine Dalton) The hardest part is recognizing and accepting what that part may be. If I were to choose a role for myself, I would be teaching dance fulltime in a school somewhere. That’s about it. Though there is absolutely nothing wrong with this calling (Yes- teaching IS a calling- you have to be a pretty amazing person to choose this sort of lifestyle), it would have been very incompatible with a Bipolar diagnosis- especially at the beginning.

No- I recognize that my focus right now is managing me/bipolar and taking care of my family.  And though its only in small parts, I have been given the opportunity to reach out to others who may suffer from the same problems I do. This is unique, and I am humbled that God sees fit that I do this.

“You’re daughters of God-

You are not alone.”

(Elaine Dalton) Daughter: I don’t think Heavenly Father takes that word very lightly. We are His children. He knows us. He loves us. Individually. Uniquely.

It is hard when you’re depressed to feel the Spirit. It is among the hardest when you feel that you have been abandoned by heaven. I know. I’ve been there. Even when I didn’t feel it- I used every ounce of strength to trust that I had felt it before, and that I would feel it again.  What gave me the most strength was the knowledge and testimony I had that Heavenly Father had sent Jesus Christ. He is my Savior, and that He knew and knows EXACTLY what I go through because He went through it, too. We are never alone. He will ALWAYS be there, if we allow him to.

THIS- THIS is the root of feeling better about myself: Who I am to God. If you matter that much to Him- to send his son to suffer just like you are- you must be pretty important.

To Be Continued...